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 What does old men dieing have to do with rain? "Its raining its pouring the old man is snoring.....he didnt wake up in the
morning" ~Special thanks to Perrine for
thinking of it.
How do we know that humpty Dumpty is an egg?
~Special thanks to Perrine for
thinking of it.
How come people tell you not to stand in front
of an emergency exit when if there was an emergency surely you would run through it?
Why did Sally sell seashells on the seashore when
you can just pick them up anyway?
In libraries, do they put the bible in the fiction
or non-fiction section?
Why are both of Spongebob's parents round like
sea sponges while he is square like a kitchen sponge?
Does a two-humped camel store more water than a
one-humped camel?
If you pamper a cow, do you get spoiled milk?
Why is it that if someone yells "duck" they are
helping you, but if they yell "chicken" they are insulting you?
If the FBI breaks your door down do they have to
pay for it?
If they have angel food cake on earth, do they
have people food cake in heaven?
If you fart and burp at the same time, would it
make a vacuum in your tummy?
Do they call a fortune teller who cant see a "blind
seer"?
Why do you put two cents in when its only a penny
for your thoughts?
Can you cry underwater?
You know the signs on restaurant doors? No Shirt,
No Shoes, No Service? what if someone goes in with No Pants? Would the restaurant still have to serve them?
If an African elephant comes to America, is it
an African-American elephant?
Why doesn't flavored gum turn your mouth that color?
If a doctor suddenly died while doing surgery,
would the other doctors work on the doctor or the patient?
Why do we sing "Rock a bye baby" to lull our little
ones to sleep when the song is about putting your baby in a tree and letting the wind crash the cradle to the ground?
Why do we say we're head over heels when we're
happy? Isn't that the way we normally are?
If the Wicked Witch of the West melts in water...
how did she ever bathe?
If bald people work as chefs in a restaurant,do
they have to wear hairnets?
Why do sleeping pills have warning labels that
state :'Caution: May Cause Drowsiness?
Do nudists have pin-ups of people with clothes
on?
How can Darth Vader breathe and talk at the same
time?
If there's a wheelchair-bound comedian, is it still
called "stand-up"?
When the French swear do they say pardon my English?
Do people who use sign language see little hands
in their head when they think about what somebody said, or do they hear the words in their head?
How did Walt Disney figure out how to make people
pay to stand in lines all day?
Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator
with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized?
Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath
you use the bubbles are always white?
Why does someone believe you when you say there
are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?
Why do they call someone "late" if they died early?
Why are the adjectives 'fast as' and 'slow as'
often used in conjunction with hell, is hell slow or fast?
If the serving size on a can of soda is one can,
then why is the serving size on the little can one can, too? Wouldn't the little cans be 2 cans?
If a king is gay and marries another guy what is
that guy to the royal family?
Why are red buttons always the most important?
How is chess considered a sport?
Why is it when your sleeping it`s called drool
but when your awake its called spit?
If a hermaphrodite got sent to a certain gender
prison, which one would it get sent to?
If a teacher were to teach a younger grade than
they were teaching before, would they be "degraded"?
If you get chemo-therapy do you lose your pubic
hairs?
Would you die if you didn't pee?
Why does every Abraham Lincoln impersonator sound
the same, even though there are no known audio recordings of the man?
How's come people tell you to stay a kid for as
long as you can. Yet the moment you do anything childish or immature they tell you to grow up.
Why does the Easter bunny carry eggs? Rabbits don't
lay eggs.
When Atheists go to Court, they can't swear on
the bible, can they?
If marbles are not made of marble, why are they
called marbles?
If you dig a hole through the center of the earth,
come out on the other side, and then let go, would you be falling down or floating up?
Could you be a closet claustrophobic?
Could someone be addicted to counseling? If so,
how would you treat them?
If ketchup is good on french fries, how come it
isn't good on mashed potatoes?
Where do all the daylight savings hours go?
Why doesn't the hair on your arms grow as fast
as the hair on your head?
What happens if a black cat walks under a ladder
and breaks a mirror?
Why when people ask you "what three things would
you bring with you on a desert island?" no one ever replies, "A BOAT"
Why are elderly people often called "old people"
but children are never called "new people"?
How does Freddy Kruger wipe his butt?
Why doesn't broccoli come in a can?
Can you slam a revolving door?
How young can you be, but still die of old age?
What would happen if you found a four-leaf-clover
under a ladder?
Can a cross-eyed teacher control his pupils?
Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator
with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized?
If winnie the pooh was civilized enough to keep
his honey in jars, why did he eat it off his hands? Surely he had spoons?
What happens if you get a paper cut from a Get
Well card?
Can you read a picture book?
Why does it say "shake well" on ketchup bottles,
but not ketchup packets?
Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on
sale?
Is eating a mermaid considered cannibalism?
Why does it say do not use before work with heavy
machinery on the back of childrens tylenol? I mean..really could we save that many people by getting those darn five year-olds
with headcolds off those forklifts!
If mirrors need light to work, what happens if
you put night vision goggles on in the dark and look at a mirror?
if you're on an American airline, and you land in Canada
and stay on the plane, is the drinking age still 21 or does it change to 19?
What happens if every team in the NFL goes 8-8?
What shape is the sky?
If a Jewish person goes to court and is asked to
put their right hand on the Bible, do they use a Torah instead?
Why is it written "May contain traces of peanuts
or other kind of nuts" on peanut butter jars. Are people stupid enough not to realize it themselves?
If you only have one eye...are you blinking or
winking?
If you have a gun and you ask, "can I ask you a
question?" and they say "fire away" should you shoot them?
What is a chickpea if it is neither a chick nor
a pea?
Why is it called the People's Republic Of China
when China's not a republic?
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